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Sometimes, life throws you into situations where you think you have no way out. You feel stuck, questioning every choice that led you here and doubting every effort you are investing into growing ahead!
Have you ever felt “Why am I here in this profession? Why did I even choose it?”
- You no longer want to hustle for something that you have been hustling for past 10-15 years?
- Does it send shivers down your spine just to think of dropping out of hustle culture to reach the top of your field?
- Do you feel tired/ burnt out due to stumbling upon jobs that lack in opportunities for growth, recognition and respect?
- Do you feel like when is my turn?
- Are you left with no option but to force yourself into choosing a path to give yourself the opportunity, recognition and respect – in this case starting your own practice? (Not everyone wants to start their own practice)
YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
What do you do?
Do you drop out of your field because only way to success, recognition and respect is starting your own practice, but you are not inclined towards it, or you have other reasons for not going ahead with it? OR keep struggling? OR is there a middle ground shift the mindset!
Read ahead to find out!
So lets list out the pros and cons of both continuing to work under someone and starting your own practice.
- MY OWN PRACTICE
- WORKING UNDER SOMEONE
PROS
- Autonomy to exercise your knowledge, skill and creativity
- Respect for what you do
- Recognition for what you do
- Freedom
- High income
CONS
- Huge investment of money
- Some form of support emotionally and professionally
- 2-3 years of latent period
- Probability of failure – risky
- No taking leaves for a period of 2-3 years – if you take leaves as per your requirement you wont build a patient base.
- Surgical branch huge amount of risk involved.
PROS
- Doesn’t need huge investments
- Not risky
- No pressure to build the institute or hustle for it
- No risk because it is already established
- Can take leaves now
- Surgical branch risk well handled by institutional policies
CONS
- No autonomy to exercise my medical knowledge, skills and creativity – has to go through hierarchy and listen to what higher ups/management say
- Possibility of treating you like Ghost
- Possibility of being yelled at and not respected
- A little less income
SO THE BIG QUESTION: WHAT DO I TRULY WANT ?
I want
- Freedom to travel
- Money
- Peace of mind
- Also a wonderful workplace which aligns with me – because I definitely can’t quit and be jobless at-least now!
Success to me means achieving the above. My earlier definition of success was something borrowed or some decision made when I was too young to even know what I really want.
The definition of success is different for different people. Only thing that matters is to ask ourselves what we really want! This realisation happened to me while I was trying to escape a bad workplace and found out that my only option to get opportunities and get recognised for my surgical skills, is to start my own practice. But is it what I really want ? Not really 🙂
That’s when I told the universe – ” I love performing surgeries, if you wish me to do surgeries you’ll be sending me workplaces that offer me to perform surgeries and recognise my skills. I am not hustling and breaking my peace and bone to get to do surgeries and definitely not giving up travel for that. Starting my own practice is not the only way to abundance, I know you are sending me a lot of abundance and I am grateful for that.” – The mindset shift.
This mindset shift eased a lot of burden. Its an epiphany that relieved me!
But how did I stumble upon this mindset shift?
A month ago, I was reading an excerpt from the book The Mountain Is You by Brianna Wiest. The author explains self-sabotage – what it looks like and how to fix it. One section, Attachment to What You Don’t Really Want, stood out to me:
I was clueless when I read this the first time. For me to understand something deeply, it needs to be relatable or explained with examples; otherwise, I only grasp it superficially. I visualise everything I read – if I can’t relate to it, I can’t visualise, and it remains abstract. That’s exactly how I felt when I first read this.
At that time, and even now one of my toxic traits was searching for instant fixes. I tried hard to understand this concept – researching, asking ChatGPT , and Googling. But in vain. Ironically, my obsession with quick solutions was a form of self-sabotage itself.
Fast- Forward to the Present – Two Months Later
I feel drained, frustrated, hopeless, and unsupported. The scenario for young ophthalmologists look bleak, except for those lucky people who find it great. From this drained-out place, I saw only one option left – starting my own eye hospital. Sounds ambitious, right?
To me, it sounded exciting – imagining all the scenarios of my own hospital, the aesthetics that I want, the modular OT, me operating complex cases and feeling happy, seeing patients happy. At the same time I felt terrified. But then, something clicked. Two months ago, I struggled to understand that passage. Now, not only do I understand it, but I also realise what I truly want in life.
When I thought the only way forward was to open my own practice, I felt even more drained and hopeless. And whenever I thought “It’s NOT necessary to start your own practice” I started spiralling in self doubt. I labelled myself lazy and unambitious. I pushed myself so hard to not think the above – to avoid the spiralling. Yet my spiralling didn’t stop. I felt confused and fearful.
In hindsight, I now see that this idea was coming from scarcity mindset. I was exhausting myself trying to climb a ladder I didn’t even want to be on.
This toxic hustle culture made me feel like I was never enough:
“Do another fellowship, then we will hire you”
“We only hire surgeons with “X” number of phacoemulsification surgeries under their belt” – can you see how this places focus on the quantity rather than quality. How are we even supposed to reach those numbers if no one gives us the opportunity to operate?!
To be honest, I worked my ass of for the past 20 years – missed the varied and true experiences of a happy childhood and any kind of teenage or early adult hood. People remember old movie songs, movies, have travelled, had fun friendships, experiences. Ask me – I only know about studying and studying and studying.
Anyways, I know I’m good at what I do. My surgical results are good, most patients are happy. And operating makes me happy. And hence I messaged the universe by making a mindset shift! “If you wish me to operate I will, and hence will you send me with great opportunities, otherwise, I m not going to struggle and hustle at the cost of my peace! Thank you”
Because what I truly want is different. I will be 33 year old this year, and honestly, I am tired. And there is no point in hustling for something I don’t really want.
So, What Do I Actually Want?
I want to live in peace every single day. This doesn’t mean to say that life is devoid of problems but I definitely will have more mental space and be more resilient to face these and also by living to the fullest I know I will be back up even when I fall! I wish to hustle only where I know “that is what I truly” want! – not in some pointless (to me) race.
For many, success means climbing the hierarchy, earning more money, getting married, having kids, and settling down. I for now don’t identify success with the same.
Everything I’ve been through happened for a reason – to teach me what I really want:
- To live peacefully
- To live with self-respect
- To stop unnecessarily doubting myself
- To be free to do what I genuinely love.
This is a profound mindset shift for me—from feeling trapped in societal expectations to finally embracing what truly resonates with me. This positive mindset shift is truly empowering.
The key takeaways from my mindset shift
- Recognizing Adopted Goals vs. Authentic Desires
- I initially felt pressure to start my own eye hospital because it seemed like the only viable path, not because it was my true calling.
- My realisation from The Mountain is You helped me see that I was trying to climb a ladder I didn’t even want to be on.
- The Hustle Trap and Scarcity Mindset
- I’ve been conditioned to think that working harder, doing more fellowships, or gaining more surgical experience is the only way forward.
- But now, I recognise that this kind of hustle isn’t leading to the life I truly want—it’s draining me instead of fulfilling me.
- Owning My Worth Without Overcompensating
- I acknowledge that I’m good at what I do. I don’t need to prove to myself by overworking or following a path dictated by external validation.
- I love operating, but I don’t want to sacrifice peace and travel for it.
- Letting Go of Forced Struggles
- I have surrendered to the idea that if the universe provides surgical opportunities, I’ll take them. ButI won’t hustle to force them at the cost of my well-being.
- This shift moves me away from a scarcity mindset (“I must struggle to get what I want”) to an abundance mindset (“What aligns with me will come to me”).
What This Means for My Life Now
- No More Forcing Myself Into an Unwanted Path
I no longer feel pressured to open an eye hospital or force opportunities to prove my worth. - Shifting Priorities
I want a peaceful life with aligned hustle—something that excites me rather than drains me. - Trusting the Flow of Life
Instead of panicking about how to make things happen, I am now willing to let go and allow the right path to unfold naturally.
This mindset shift is life-changing for me – lightens up so much of the pressure, feels empowered, feels at peace! It means I’ve broken free from an old cycle of fear-driven ambition. Now, I get to shape my future on my own terms.
By the way, when I began writing this, I had started applying for different hospitals for better opportunities. We got to do what needs to be done, right! Yes and I landed a better job by the time I finished writing this. And believe it or not, a week after my mindset shift, I started to get opportunities to operate (though not completely- but yes better, which made me happy) at my present workplace! More abundance my way! Yeyy!
Your turn now! Have you ever been in a similar situation? What did you do then or are you still figuring out ? Share your thoughts in the comments below. 👇 I would love to hear your experience and may be, just may be, we can figure this journey out together!
If you found this post relatable, hit the like button and share it with someone who needs to hear this. Let’s build a community that uplifts and support each other.
Signing off. Hoping to connect over shared experiences.
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